You’re so vain
And I bet he did
Think her song was
About him
But I know what she meant
Because my muse is back
And none of this is
Actually about you
It’s about cleaning out
The cobwebs
Sweeping dust bunnies
From under the bed
Spring cleaning
My heart, my mind
Setting the ducks
In a row
Then admiring them there
Rearranging furniture
Making space for
What’s to come
Singing while I work
You are also so vain
But this is
Most definitely
Not about you
I think about you
All alone
Surveying the damage
Bombed out relationships
Devastating losses
Wondering how it feels
To know it was you
Who pulled the trigger
Pressed the button
Blasted away
Trust, respect
Integrity
Destroying
Companionship
Warm touches
Even salty tears
Because around you now
Sits desolation
A poison cloud
Is the air you breathe
Do you wonder
If your other lies
Will catch up to you?
Your racist slurs
Your angry stabbings
At friends and neighbors
Every green thing
You killed
While you cry about the
Unfairness of life
It’s all out to get you
Or so you say
When I do think about you
It’s in pity
The love is gone
The longing, too
My thoughts are not
Wistful
Because your
Missiles were often
Aimed at me
You sought to
Use my vulnerability
And my kindness
As proving grounds
For your artillery
But my karma
Protected me
Still I tried to help you
As I winced in pain
Bandaged the wounds
You made
Before my escape
I’m safe now, but you?
You are the victim
Of your own karma
The sum of your words
Your deceit
Those selfish ways
Have anchored you there
In the misery you created
Alone, angry and crying “why me?”
Railing against the mess
You made
Forlorn
On a windy day
Takes patience
Determination
A fragile tendril
Of smoke
Shield it
Blow gentle
Slow breath
No rush
Feed it tinder
Bit by bit
Good things
Grow slowly
Add the kindling
Little twigs at first
Embers glow
A stick, a bigger stick
Flames rise
Lay on the logs
Bask in the warmth
Of a solid fire
A fire that
Well-tended
Will keep us
Warm
For many
Many
Nights
Far enough away
That the smell of deceit
And anger
And all those other
Nasty parts
Aren’t even on the horizon
They are
Past
The rising action
In a story
That’s over now
After a doozy of a
Denouement
The protagonist won
(Hey, that’s you!)
Won back your dignity
Won back your joy
Wiser, singed a bit
But your heart is still
On your sleeve
No one will destroy
Your capacity to love
The resolution was
Sublime
The villain is defeated
Dead to you
While you are
Wholly intact
And you’ve shut the book
Walked away
And found
Happiness again
Things that are ironic right now:
Germany defending a country against the USA (my, my, what 70 years can do!)
“Don’t tread on me,” NRA lovers suddenly chanting “comply or die” everywhere. The same people who screamed protest against government over reach cheering on ICE brutality and Constitutional violations.
MAGA loyalists who were all about exposing child sex traffickers and are now kissing the *ss of a pedophile protector (and adjudicated rapist, 34x felon).
People who freaked out about having to wear masks to PROTECT THE VULNERABLE equating that with being the same as masked goon squads brutally attacking and kidnapping people. (It's never been about freedom to them; it's about them having all power to force their will upon others.)
The ones they call fragile snowflakes are ACTUALLY the ones bravely standing up to fascism, government overreach, child trafficking, and brutality.
So-called Christians gloating over Renee Good’s murder when Jesus taught us to lay down our lives for others.
Same so-called Christians aligning themselves with “might makes right” ideology and again ignoring *everything* Jesus taught
So-called pro-lifers all about terrorizing and harming people because their skin isn’t white and they might have accents.
They don’t even see that they are JUST LIKE the people who demanded Barabas and crucified Jesus.
It was already insanely ironic that it was evangelicals who supposedly believe "faith over fear" while they fearmonger 24/7- afraid of what they call the “LGBQT agenda,” CRT (my former pastor at Crossroads CMA was very concerned about these), afraid of their “rights” being violated by masks, vaccines, yoga, Harry Potter, etc.
There is more… what else is ironic?
Nice guys
They say they
Finish last
And maybe, girl
It’s because you had to discover
To fix, but
All that fixing is exhausting
And your knuckles are bruised
Your nails torn
From constantly
Having your hands in the engine
Only after do you discover
That the nice guy
Doesn’t need your hands bloodied
Because he wants to hold them
He doesn’t need you to fix him
Because he fixes himself
Because he is stable
And will make it to the
Finish line
Without a single one of your tears
For fuel
He runs on your smiles
Instead
Why do we think
We need closure
To understand
Before we can move on?
Sometimes there is
No understanding
Why someone is that
Fucked up
Why he is so broken
And poisonous
He simply does not
Deserve
A minute more
No, leave that door open
Put it behind you
As you race through it
Run, run towards the clarity
That can only be achieved
By living your life well
Let him see your back
Strong and full of purpose
As you head towards
Happiness
And freedom
There is nothing back there
You need to know
Nothing that giving
Another second of
Precious time
Will clarify
Make your exit
And you will find
Detachment is
The greatest closure
The swiftest peace
The most powerful
Joy
