And then there were also gourds...

 My latest accidental pumpkin patch has perplexed me … while I know that I threw a pumpkin out to rot in hopes of a repeat of the spectacular surprise 2018 patch, I am not growing just pumpkins. In fact, while I can boast of a modest  four pumpkins - and three of these quite small,  I have somehow been growing at least two dozen yellow and green gourds. I did not plant gourds. I have no idea where they came from but they are beautiful and interesting…and prolific. More appear regularly and they hide better than the pumpkins. Cucurbita pepo is the scientific name of pumpkin, Cucurbita pepo ovifera is the decorative fancy schmancy gourd which is growing amongst the pumpkin vines. They are so closely related that I wonder if some sort of genetic “thing” happened. 

God gave me my first accidental pumpkin patch three years ago and man, did I feel BLESSED. I’ve never been any sort of a gardener and suddenly I was a pumpkin farmer! I was out there fighting powder dust mildew and slugs, keeping them watered and safe from harm. They kept trying to grow into the street, so I was redirecting vines daily - they can grow more than a foot overnight. Those pumpkins gave me a sense of purpose and a feeling of joy during a very difficult time. I’d started a new job that, while it paid pretty lousy, I felt confident that God would take care of me financially and that it was a place where I could really give back. Unfortunately, it was a Viking slave ship masquerading as a ministry and I was one of many who were burnt out within the first six weeks. Those pumpkins, that beautiful pumpkin patch, were brimming with optimism that was much needed that late summer and autumn. That pumpkin patch taught me so many things about finding life after decay, rising up out of grief and misery and seeing the hope and goodness that could show up unexpectedly and hang around if I would just nurture it.

I tried to purposefully start a pumpkin patch the next year and managed to grow a vine or two. It was planted where I felt it should be, the “perfect” place or so I thought. The little vines flowered but it was always male flowers, so no fruit. I put the plant where I wanted it, tried to take care of it… but it did not grow. The best laid plans of mice and would-be pumpkin farmers don’t always work out.  I was disappointed but I had other fruit in my life at that time. I’d wound up teaching where I was definitely making a difference. I had other fruit to marvel at and thank God for. 

And so this year, I still wanted a pumpkin patch but I knew where it certainly was not going to grow...the place that I thought it should grow.  I had a pumpkin that had survived past Christmas and into the later part of winter. One day I threw it out in the snow in the general vicinity (but safer, away from the road a little) that the first patch had grown. Spring came, the time of pumpkin vines came… and I didn’t see a plant starting at the proper time, so I assumed it was a flop.  It was a season where I also had big decisions to make, a time where I really wanted to escape from charter schools and all the shenanigans. I had purpose, evidence that I was making a difference and yet my integrity, my ethics were challenged. I’m not wired to let that slack. 

And so, a pumpkin vine started. It started small, didn’t seem like it would flourish...but I took care of it. I grew concerned when it was late July and I had not seen a female flower, but still I cared for the patch. Finally, one happy day, the first female flower arrived and I helped the process along with a Q-tip. Happily, the pumpkin that became the bigger one began to grow. I hovered and hoped, but it was a while before another female flow appeared. But then suddenly, mystifyingly, the gourds began to appear. Flower after flower blossomed and while I wasn’t seeing the females clearly, daily new baby gourds were growing. How could it be? I stopped wondering as they became more and more abundant. 

The vines grew, they climbed the Rose of Sharon. Suddenly, I had truly “ornamental” gourds that grew dangling from the bush. How curious and how festive! While enjoying the novelty, I also had to battle the gastropod horde that came to feast, as well as the powder dust mildew that plagues the leaves. Beauty and bounty must be protected. To be blessed is wonderful, and diligent care is an expression of gratitude. 

Back in the months after  Pat passed away, I wrote a poem about how I was never much of a gardener (found here:  https://glynis-p.blogspot.com/2016/11/not-much-of-gardener.html ). It was a poem about hope - about the toil put in a life and then that life suddenly abandoned and finding optimism in that barren dirt. I later had my first accidental pumpkin patch and it wasn’t lost on me that, with the Lord’s help, I had become a capable pumpkin farmer. I wrote about its death here ( https://glynis-p.blogspot.com/2018/11/the-death-of-accidental-pumpkin-patch.html ). It is so interesting that I find myself at this new place - having thought I had pumpkins and also growing gourds - not where I most desired to to try to grow them, but it the spot that the Lord had chosen before and chose again.  Proverbs 16:9 “The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.” Psalm 37:23 “The steps of a man are ordered by the LORD who takes delight in his journey.”

I can’t say anymore that I’m not much of a gardener, although I seem to do best with the family Curcubitae. I can see something new in myself that has developed, all starting with a blessing and then a desire to protect that blessing and bring it to harvest. Looking at my life in the past several years, God chose to lead me to getting my teaching license and I had just completed my master’s degree three weeks after Pat passed away - starting a career after 33 years of marriage, 4 grown daughters and 10 then, now 12 grandchildren.  Likewise, my ability to garden came late - my plants didn’t start in mid-late spring - nope, my plants grew and flowered in the mid-late summer (and even autumn). It might also be seen as late, this new  phase of my life which has been blooming. I chose to look for blessing in the new life and gaze with hopeful trust  at the barren dirt, so I saw life spring from a rotted pumpkin in a pile of decaying leaves.  I’ve been growing; my plants have been growing. They bloom and bear fruit; I’ve seen blossom and fruition spiritually and professionally. While the patch  suffered from the attacks of slugs and mildew, I also struggled against trials and tribulations. I fought for the pumpkins/gourds, and I sincerely felt the Lord for me. The miracle of my pumpkin patch mirrors the growth and development of the new life.

I felt blessed and perfectly content being able to call myself “gardener” and growing pumpkins; God chose to give me gourds, too.  Who knows what other awesome, fun and exciting things He might do? Look at the barren dirt, break up the fallow ground, and be amazed.

Deconstructing

Over a year ago as the Pandemic had just begun, I texted my best friend about how bizarre it all was and “to top it off, Hank Hanegraaff has left the evangelical church.” For nearly three decades, Hank was The Bible Answer Man - the go-to source for all things apologetic-related. My friend and I greatly respected him. Both of us were shocked, it was as if we heard of someone landing on the moon for the first time. We’d already heard about the deconstruction of Joshua Harris (I Kissed Dating Goodbye) and I’d also become aware of Rhett and Link’s deconstruction. Why was this happening? Was this a “great falling away” or was it something else? If THE Hank Hanegraaff had left evangelicalism, I wanted to try to understand why. 

 I discovered that Hank had some concerns that I had - “We live in an age of ‘pastor-preneur,’ where the pastor is the entrepreneur,” Hanegraaff said. “And the church has become consumerist. Instead of Christ being the end, Christ becomes the means to an end. Instead of people coming to the master’s table because of the love of the master, they come to the master’s table because of what is on the master’s table.” For me, I saw people coming to Christ for what they perceived they could get on a different level, a more social and political level, rather than genie-in-the-bottle prosperity - as the Pandemic revved to motion, it became clear that the white evangelical church inspired adherence to the “Me Version Bible.” And this is where I began to deconstruct. 

 I had a strange little hobby for a while, it was reading up on various plagues and pestilences. I was given books for birthday presents and sought out others in the library. One book that had fascinated me was “Flu,” by Gina Kolata about the 1918 Spanish Flu. I had also read the book that inspired George W. Bush to start setting up a pandemic preparedness plan, “The Great Influenza: The Story of the Deadliest Plague in History” by John M. Barry. Therefore, when February 2020 rolled around and COVID-19 began developing into a serious international problem, I completely agreed with the level of caution that authorities were demanding. From here, my tale of personal deconstruction begins and there are two major catalysts. The way fellow believers behaved during the pandemic and their love affair with Donald J. Trump. I will address the latter first. Up until this point, I was a “hold my nose and deal with it” Republican who disliked Trump but decided he was doing enough stuff that I liked which led to me just keeping my mouth closed. I did tend to believe some of the things about the press treating him unfairly as well as that the mainstream media was lopsided. 

In early 2020, my atheist brother confronted me on this. He asked if I was a Christian and Christ taught “a, b, and c” then how could I go along with (list of DJTs sins here). My answer? He was doing things I agree with and a lengthy list of his conservative-pleasing accomplishments(which I later fact-checked and it was chock-full of spin, spin, spin). The conversation became heated and nasty. I was in tears, feeling persecuted (after all, I didn’t actually like Donald Trump). However, I could not get past the fact that as a Christian, if I truly did believe what Christ taught, how could I say what I was condoning was okay? I began to deconstruct my Christianese excuses for being a silent supporter. The structure toppled in light of Truth. It would only become more apparent that silence was complicity. I am forever grateful for the confrontation and how God used it to lead me back to Him. 

 The behavior of many fellow church-goers as the Pandemic broke out? Startling is putting it mildly. All that we were taught about loving our neighbors as ourselves, esteeming the needs of others more highly than our own, being subject to governmental authorities.... It was all falling by the wayside. I heard the gospel of ME. “My rights were being violated!” “The government is just using these to steal our freedom!” “It’s all a trial run at turning us into communists!” Locally, I was seeing precious little love for neighbor (forget loving enemies entirely!) -Facebook rants and memes were all about “I can’t breathe with a mask on!” and sharing every fly-by-night YouTube video that supported fighting mask mandates and lockdowns, things that I knew from history and common-sense epidemic practices were the best way to save lives. 607,000 American deaths later and many of the same people ranting this stuff still subscribe to it. 

Even as death tolls rose, supposed Christians were sharing heartless posts about how the elderly and immuno-compromised were expendable. It was disgusting. Disgusting on a human level and appalling on a “follower of Christ” level. Yes, I commented on these posts. Yes, I engaged with them scripture. Time and again. No one, not one person - deaconess, worship leader, Sunday school teacher, etc, offered me any Biblical backing for their positions. The response that I did hear a lot was about how “God wants us to FIGHT for our freedom and for the TRUTH.” Again, never backed by scripture, just by intensity that this was what God wants. Funny, I distinctly saw in red letters Him saying something completely different. 

 These two catalytic points converged as DJT did an about-face on the Pandemic health measures. Suddenly, that personal freedom agenda and hatred for liberals infiltrated the feeds of my “Christian” facebook friends. Mockery, scorn, slander were commonplace on the pages of those I had fellowshipped with. It was the evil Dr. Fauci trying to control us, the lying mainstream media trying to deceive us, the socialist agenda trying to ensnare us. Conspiracy theories abounded. Fact-checking was ridiculed. Hatred for those protesting systemic racism. Scorn for immigrants. It’s as if Matthew 25 did not exist. Pastor friends I knew for years were complaining about THEIR tax money going to pay for undocumented immigrants "stealing" from our citizens. (I'm of the belief that if you render to Casear what is Casear's, it's not yours anymore. But honestly, if God tells us to take care of strangers, isn't He able to provide?). I became a terrible person for questioning this behavior. I was called a liberal commie *unt by a run of the mill conservative who decided I'd gone to the left because I was for kindness, justice, mercy. I was messaged by several church and homeschooling people asking, “What has happened to you????” because I didn’t run down that patriot path and join the crowd. Jesus happened to me and I thought He had happened to you, too. 

 I could continue with endless examples of the things I saw, discussions I had, names I was called for not fitting in with the status quo. One thing mattered to me - the testimony of Christ’s church. If the church was sharing hatred, engaging in open mockery and scorn, it was bringing shame to the Name of Jesus. It was sending out a gospel that was totally unlike the Good News that called me to Him. And so, I began to return to that first love, that faith which first brought me to Christ. I began to deconstruct.

When I first became a follower of Christ, I knew nothing of Calvinism or any man-made doctrine. I read the Word, I believed it, I repented of my sins, and asked Him to lead me. He did. My late husband and I were discipled by a church that taught us about love and obedience. They didn’t spend time pounding eternal-conscious-torment into our heads and that is NOT what brought me to Christ. And so, I began to compare what I’d been taught over the years since then with the Jesus that I first met and with scripture. It was very different. 

I’ve always identified with the Bereans and their noble need to research and prove things were correct, not believing anything without checking. Obviously, there was a need to do this because so many Christians who had attended church right alongside me over the years were not embracing a theology of neighbor and enemy loving, of trusting in Christ in the midst of turmoil. In fact, what I was seeing was rage and anger - how everything was lost if DJT was not president, that he had to be restored or we were all doomed. This did not mesh and I needed to find out what was really following Jesus and what wasn’t. 

 Now in the white evangelical church, I had already discovered that people don’t like it if you are smart and, in fact, act as if that is detrimental to your spiritual health. Of course, it didn’t matter that the Apostle Paul was a great intellect or that the other writers of the New Testament were well-read and referenced popular culture of their day. A woman with a brain was a danger to herself… but is that what God thought? Or did He bless me with brains and curiosity because of the simple joy it would give me in seeking to know Him more? 

 At this time, The Gospel Coalition was sharing quite a bit regarding the horrible behavior of evangelicals. Morning discussions on Moody Radio also discussed the fracture that was occurring due to politics and pandemic. I discovered Phil Vischer’s Holy Post podcast, first with his episode on systemic racism (eye opener) and I was soon subscribed. I realized that, “WOW!” There were Christians struggling with exactly what I am struggling with. I didn’t want to be in a place of disillusionment. I loved Jesus with all my heart and did not want to go the way of others before me who left their faith entirely because of the abuses they saw in the church. Thankfully, my son-in-law introduced me to the Bema Discipleship Podcast. 

 Bema Discipleship is a deconstructive study of Scripture. As they describe it: ““BEMA” (or bimah) is a Hebrew word that refers to the elevated platform in the center of first-century synagogues where the people of God read the Text. At that time, the community of God’s people did not gather in buildings that faced a stage with an audience, but rather they allowed their gathering to reflect what they hoped to be true of their lives — it was centered around the Word of God. The BEMA Discipleship program is an attempt to recapture a few of those elements present in the early church. It is not our desire to recreate an ancient world, but to learn from its successes and implement something vibrant into the culture of today.” And I fell in love with Jesus all over again. Through the cultural, historical, geographical and linguistic deconstruction of the Word, I found the story of two kingdoms, the kingdom of Empire and the kingdom of Shalom. I relearned how to create space for God and to be His friend.] because Bema encourages a “A space where asking questions is incentivized and not discouraged. A space that God could fill — the way He desires to fill it. To love God. To love others. To become people of the Text.” 

 Through that I found Tim Mackie’s The Bible Project as well as the man white evangelical Christian leadership loves to call a heretic, Rob Bell. In fact, I hadn’t yet read Bell when a pastor mentioned him and his “heresy.” That intrigued me, so one day while I painted my kitchen, I listened to the audiobook of “Love Wins.” Instead of finding heresy, I found more truth than a twisted, taken out of context, forgetting rabbinical teaching tradition/history/geography human doctrines on “eternal conscious torment.” I discovered that C.S. Lewis, who I grew up on, didn’t espouse that nonsense and that looking at the Bible as a whole story, I no longer was falling for it either. I’ve been reconstructing a faith that’s built on Jesus, not on the doctrines of modern day Pharisees. I've found places to wrestle and discuss, such as The New Evangelicals group. I've found new ways to have my thinking challenged and it has all led me to deeper faith.  The evangelical church has prayed for revival for a long time. This is it. It is here now. I’m a part of a new reformation, as are others like me. 

Yes, there was a great falling away but it wasn’t us. It was a church that married politics and self-preservation rather than Christ. And with that, here I am. I’m in a place where the elders were “concerned” with my “apparent move away from orthodoxy” and my interaction with the worship leader/deaconesses/Sunday school teachers who were sharing all the mockery/hatred/scorn/conspiracy and wanted to meet with me. Due to that concern and the fact that I really do not agree with them theologically, I wrote my letter of departure from that church membership. Where I’m NOT is at a place with no fellowship with other believers. The believers I interact with talk about Jesus and following Him all the time. We informally come together in person, by text, online, with a psalm, a hymn, etc. We encourage one another in the faith as I was rarely encouraged before. Like Hank Hanegraaff, I’ve discovered that life matters and I, too, just want to worship.

Work in progress

Wait I fixed something... Walking in the park Going my own way The dogs they bark The children play For a moment Our worlds collide Then they drift away A walk in the park On this sunny day Sometimes my life Seems so so big But now it’s small I take a breath I’m just a part A part of it all Our worlds collide Then they drift away A walk in the park On a sunny day A couple holding hands A leaf blows past my face Butterflies dance I drink in this grace It’s only happenstance To find myself in this place To be caught up in life’s dance Come together, pull apart Round and round We are all part Our worlds collide Then they drift away A walk in the park On a sunny day

Veil Lifted

The greatest compliment I think I’ve ever been given came from my dear friend, Mike, about a month ago.  He’s known me since we were kids and we have some of the best and deepest conversations. In the midst of once such conversation, I said something about my innate need to seek knowledge.  He said, “No, you are driven to UNDERSTAND.” 

It’s funny how if you forget you have sunglasses on, the glare of a hot sun doesn’t bother you as it beats off the pavement or sends powerful glares off cars that speed by.  Take off those glasses as you ride down the highway on a bright, sunny day and the first thing you do is squint..why? Because the light is bright and your eyes aren’t adjusted. The glare off a passing window hurts when the beams of light accost your eyes. Remove those shades and the comfort fades away, you find that you see and experience things that you were oblivious to behind the comfort of the tinted plastic lenses. 

Over the past few years since Pat passed away, the veil over my eyes has been removed in many ways -- and I’m thankful, truly thankful.  When I look back on views I held, news bits and memes that I shared a few years ago, I’m ashamed at my ignorance and humbled by my arrogance. I once believed things like if you were a Christian you practically “had’ to be a Republican and that saying “all lives matter” was an absolute appropriate response to “black lives matter.” I balked at the idea of white privilege, although having lived in the South I definitely had more understanding of the concept and didn’t believe it did not exist. Nope, I just questioned whether I had any of it. 

Months ago, my brother - a liberal - messaged me out of the blue and began berating me on how could I support Trump given X, Y and Z. First, I was stunned by his anger because I’ve not been a big “Woo-hoo, Go Trump!” person. My first reaction was , “What the heck?” and the attack frustrated me. In the midst of it he was asking “How can a professing Christian tolerate these things?” That caught my attention. I had already seen very clearly the effect that was produced on unbelievers by “Christians” loudly ranting about their “rights” and not wearing masks. When those on the outside see that what you are saying/supporting  is in opposition of what you are professing to believe, there’s a problem, Houston. I realized that his anger came from confusion - how could I say “A” and seem to condone “B”?  By the way - I'm thankful to him for this conversation. God blessed me in ways I could understand at that moment.

When explaining my stance to him, I said that I’ve accepted the things Trump  did that I felt were good and possibly ignored the things about his personality that I didn’t like. I heard about his nastiness on Twitter but as long as he was mainly doing what I thought was good, I didn’t pay much attention and attributed it to his abrasive personality that I “didn’t have to like if he was getting the job done.” . He said this to me near the end of our conversation, “Your whole defense of Trump now is that anything other than a bend-over backwards generous interpretation of his words, with nothing worth of blame unless it is spelled out in exact literal words, is absurd.  Interpretation and applying context are absolutely necessary parts of communication and not “mind reading.” And you would never argue otherwise, unless it’s necessary to defend what you want to defend.”  Now, above all else, as Mike said, I strive to understand. Why was I not trying to understand where my brother was coming from and what he was seeing? I prayed that God would help me to see this, to understand, that He would give me wisdom.

And the veil lifted. It was like being hit with a tsunami.  I’d already been watching the hateful things - and the very blind things, being shared on the left and suddenly I could clearly see the hateful things and the very blind things being shared on the right. I was already in a bit of shock over the rage/anger of anti-mask Christians focusing on perceived personal rights. “The wrath of man does not work the righteousness of God.” It lessened the blow as I saw the things my brother saw coming from right-wing Christians. So much wrath on both sides. Armed with misinformation, distrust and a “stick with the party line” mentality, both sides have created a war zone.  I find myself in the middle, caught in the crossfire but seeing the need to STOP. LISTEN. LEARN. CHANGE.

Today, I was told something I’ve been told a lot lately, “I don’t know who you are anymore.” That’s okay, because now I understand better than ever who I really am and who I am supposed to be.  I’m a Christian, a Christ follower.  I think that aligning myself with a political party made me forget that or not fully grasp its meaning. Yes, I’m an American and so proud and so grateful to have been born into this land… but I’m a Christ follower FIRST. What I believe and support politically has to be in line with His Word and not the other way around. I can’t try to build my theology around a party platform. Facebook “memories” have come back to haunt me and showed me how clearly I was doing that and I repent. The steps of the righteous man are ordered by God, not by political affiliation. My walk with Jesus and my obedience to His Word is more important to me than any social acceptance that groupthink would give me. .   

As Mike said, I’m one who seeks to understand. This means I want to know facts. I will research. The veil has been lifted, the sunglasses removed - I won’t just accept the party line on racism and Black Lives Matter when Jesus tells me to love my neighbor and esteem their needs more highly than my own. I won’t accept the party line when it comes to COVID-19 and all the many facets of *that* crisis.  When I see abject falsehood and lies, I’m likely to share wherein the deception is found. My continual prayer is that the Lord will help me line up my stances with His Word and His heart. 

One thing I need to get better at is praying for those that are currently blowing my mind with the lack of empathy for the dead, sick, injured or oppressed. It’s way too easy to fall into a different kind of separation, one that is not related to “be holy as I am holy,” or “come out from among them and be separate.” I don’t want to allow the middle to turn into a new clique where we look down our noses at  those on the outside.  The middle needs to be a place of where we take the time to understand,where there is discourse, where first we care, we listen and we talk, and then we work together. 

And so, to the many people who say, “Who are you? I don’t recognize the person you," or "I'm surprised at your position." I’m really not different. Since early 1984 Jesus has always come first for me; I just didn't realize yet how I was trying to conform Him rather than be transformed. The same girl that tried to understand 45 years ago is the one who wants to understand and do better now. 

Racial Injustice and you...

Racial injustice.Watch Phil Vischer’s video, PLEASE.(I’ll include it again in the comments).  I’m seeing many comments/posts where people say, “I’m not a racist; this is division caused by the media. I’m not apologizing to anyone.I don’t see racism where I live.” If you are not a racist, are you an American citizen? If you are, you should believe in liberty and justice for ALL. If you are not a racist, are you a Christian believer? If you are, then you should want to show you are His disciple by your LOVE. No one is asking you to apologize -- it is wonderful if you do not engage in bigotry, but it is not enough. We have an obligation to our fellow man to CARE. 

Jesus told the parable of the Good Samaritan.  When a Israelite traveler was beaten, robbed and left for dead, the priest -a respected man in his community - saw him and walked to the other side of the street. The injured man wasn’t his problem; he didn’t beat him. Pfft, and the last thing he wanted to do was become ceremonially unclean and screw up his plans.  The Levite, also a respected member of his society, also passed by seeing the injured man dying on the roadside. He, too,left him there.  A third man then happened upon the fallen traveler. This man was a Samaritan, he was hated by the Israelites and yet when he saw this man with his injuries left for dead on the roadside, he took compassion on him. He cleansed his wounds with oil and wine, but him on his own donkey and brought him to an inn. There he paid the innkeeper to tend to him until he returned, promising to pay whatever further costs were accrued.

When Jesus was through telling this story, he turned to the man, an expert in the law, with whom He was engaged in conversation and asked,  “Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”  The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”  Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”

Did you read that? GO AND DO LIKEWISE.  Sorry, we don’t get a free pass to cross to the other side of the street and pretend our neighbors are not being oppressed. We don’t get to be respected and comfortable in our lives.  We are commissioned by our Savior to DO SOMETHING. How about instead of complaining - listen. Instead of absolving yourself, educate yourself at the how/why/what of the matter. Instead of blaming it on the media, perhaps turn off the TV and spend some quality time exploring ways you can make a difference. You may not have caused the wounds, but like the Good Samaritan you can bandage them and become part of the healing process. 

Amos 5:24  “But let justice roll on like a river, righteousness like a never-failing stream!”

Zechariah 7:9  “This is what the LORD Almighty said: ‘Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another.”

Matthew 25:40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’”

What does your letter say?

For all of us Christians, do you ever ask yourself who am I? What is your identity? If you ask yourself who you are, what first comes to mind? Think on that for a minute. Does redeemed child of God come first or is it somewhere after things like, “Teacher, Mechanic, Republican, Patriot, mother, father, friend, artist, poet….” Or is Believer first?  If it is not, then think about why bondservant of Christ is not #1. Where is your treasure? Where your treasure is, there, indeed, is your heart.  Jesus said we are to love the Lord our God with ALL our heart, ALL our soul, ALL our mind, and ALL your strength. Do you see that in yourself? Are the other things in line with Christ-follower?  2 Corinthians 13:5 “Examine yourselves as to whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Do you not know yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you are disqualified.’ We need to examine ourselves often and, yes, it is very uncomfortable and even terribly painful at times. You know that speck in our own eye that we need to look at? Find it. (I guarantee you, God will work on you and you’ll find another and another. I feel like I’m layered like an onion. One layer comes off and reveals another new sin God wants me to see and repent of ). 

Move on to the next question: John 14:15 says, “If you love me, keep my commandments.” What did Jesus say was the greatest commandment? Look in the paragraph above - love Him with your ALL because He is your ALL in ALL. What’s the second? To love your neighbor as yourself.  Ephesians 5:29 states that, “for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church.” We should be loving others as Christ loved us - sacrificially, Ouch. That’s hard. And yet, this is the mark of a Believer. In John 13:35, Jesus tells us, ““By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” Look at verse 34 because He says, “as I have loved you.” Again, how does He love us? Yes, sacrificially. What is involved in that? I won’t list all of the verses here because the whole BIble joyfully shouts it - go the extra mile, give the cloak as well, esteem the needs of others more highly than your own. Visit the sick, the imprisoned, comfort those in mourning.  Love your enemies. Pray for those that persecute you. Do good to those who despitefully use you.  How should we do it?? WITHOUT grumbling and complaining. (Yikes, also hard).

Next question: who are the people that are going to know us by our love? The world. Those outside. Unbelievers. “Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone," Col. 4:5-6  Our lives are no longer our own, they are hidden with Christ in God. Those lives we live in the flesh have a purpose - to share  the Good News, to do the good works that were created beforehand for us to walk in. Whatever we do in word or deed, we are to do it all to glorify Him. That’s humbling, isn’t it? This is what the world should see. (Thank goodness for Romans 7, because this is a tall order but we have a GREAT Savior).

2 Corinthians 3:3 “You show that you are a letter from Christ, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts.” Another question:  what does your letter say? 

Okay, this is where the pictures come in. This is a very small sampling of the reaction the world has to the letter many of us are sharing with them during these days of COVID19 - and it is not pretty.  It is bringing shame to the name of Jesus.  Some of us have made a huge issue about the masks - and yes, I know you have your “right to your own opinion,” but I ask - who are you in Christ? Who do you belong to? Whose opinion should you have?  If you have been bought with that precious blood, then earthly “rights” and “treasures” should pale compared to the divine wonder of serving Jesus. 

These pictures are just a couple of comments answering believers who proclaim their faith but also loudly protest the wearing of masks. I’ve seen so many more - and I’ve seen believers posting that “everyone who knows me knows I am good, kind, etc.…”  Yes, and to people who know you this is likely very true -- but what does your letter read to those Outside. What do they see? That, my friends, is where the rubber meets the road. If we are to be 1) subject to governing authorities and 2) show our love by our actions (faith without works is dead) and the world sees the simple discomfort of a mask as a way to show the beautiful caring heart of Christ, how can we do otherwise?  Where is our treasure? And is not the God we profess able to strengthen us and uphold us through such a small discomfort? We have brothers/sisters in Christ around the world dying to spread the Gospel and yet this small act of love is protested loudly and with tremendous complaint all over social media. Read Matthew 5:43-48 - we should go beyond loving ourselves, loving our own household.  

We represent Jesus. We should be shouting 2 Corinthians 5:20 “Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God” rather than stomping our feet about our rights being violated by an act of kindness (that many work hard to dig up anything that will get us off the hook from doing).  If it doesn’t hurt you that unbelievers are appalled by the ranting and raving over masks, ask yourself again who you are.  If you are not happy with the answer, repent, put your focus back on Him, remember His love for you and let Him write the letter He wants you to share with the world. 

**Yes, these comments have foul language; I’m sharing these few so we who are His see us as the world sees.There are far worse.  Is this what we, the Church, want our letter to the outside to read?  Remember, these are in response to professing Christians publicly complaining about masks. (The ones criticizing government officials are awful, too. I look back on my past political posturing and I am so ashamed). Let’s walk circumspectly, members of the Body. 

To ere on the side of kindness

One thing my children probably heard me say 100 times or more is, "It is better to be safe than sorry."  That means it is better to be cautious than potentially wind up hurting yourself or someone else.  We live in a day where caution and safety are being urged by our government officials --- and the mobs are yelling, "No!" Their claim is that by doing these things, we are allow our rights to be stolen. I firmly believe that if we, as Christians, are to be in error, we should err on the side of kindness.

To be cautious is not to be fearful.  Caution is a having a healthy respect for danger. Ephesians 5:15-17 states, "See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil.  Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is." Circum means around, spect means to look. We are to look all the way around a situation in order not to be foolish.  To be cautious out of love for your neighbor fits right in with the teachings of Christ.

Eugene Parks writes for Gospel Coalition that "Our Idols Are Exposed in Times of Crisis." Hoarding toilet paper is a great example of this. There are many others during this pandemic.  A non-believer read a professing Christian's newsfeed. He saw lots of "Jesus loves you," and "I follow Jesus," on her feed. He also saw hateful slander. He saw a refusal to act in courtesy and love for sake of caution towards others. He pointed out - after expressing his extreme discuss for people who "Hail, Jesus" but hate their neighbor and refuse to act in love - that he thought this was America where we would go the extra mile to help our neighbor.  Was he seeing it in Christians? No.

If ever a time the world could call Christians hypocrites, it is now. When one is asked to be mildly inconvenienced (to wear a mask in public places), and to freak out and say it is violating your rates is diametrically opposed to everything the Bible teachers us about imitating Christ.  We are asked to wear it because enough public health experts believe it will help prevent the spread to *others* if we are asymptomatic carriers. Imagine Jesus saying to you, "Child, please do this to show your love for these weak or elderly that I love?" Would you turn to Jesus and said, "The government is just trying to force me to be compliant. Give an inch, they'll take a mile. This expert or that expert says it could possibly be useless or hurt me or..."  Yes, we heap up prophets to tell us what our itching ears want to hear to avoid a basic command: LOVE.  How did Jesus love us? Sacrificially. Unbelievers are seeing this and Jesus is being scorned.

Sadly, what happens when we get the opportunity to show that love in a small way?  Anger. Outrage. Demand for "our rights." Fear of our liberties being taken away.  Walk circumspectly - how does the world see this? How does Jesus see this?

Eugene Parks shares this verse and writes, "“If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it” (Matt. 16:24–25).

Jesus calls us not to double down on our freedom, but to sacrifice it out of love for our neighbor. There is no better time to do that than now."

Images from all over the world show people - of all faiths and no faith- accepting inconvenience for the sake of trying to prevent neighbors from the spread of COVID19. Conspiracy theorists want us to take that loving compliance as foolishly giving away freedom to those with nefarious intent. And yet, in Matthew 5:46-47 Jesus says, " If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?" If the world finds it a necessary sacrifice to be part of the solution, why are we so self-centered? Colossians 4:5 reads, "Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity."

1 Peter 2: 16-25 "Act as free men, and do not use your freedom as a covering for evil, but use it as bondslaves of God. Honor all people, love the brotherhood, fear God, honor the king.

Servants, be submissive to your masters with all respect, not only to those who are good and gentle, but also to those who are unreasonable.  For this finds favor, if for the sake of conscience toward God a person bears up under sorrows when suffering unjustly.  For what credit is there if, when you sin and are harshly treated, you endure it with patience? But if when you do what is right and suffer for it you patiently endure it, this finds favor with God.

For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps,  who committed no sin, nor was any deceit found in His mouth;  and while being reviled, He did not revile in return; while suffering, He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously; and He Himself bore our sins in His body on the cross, so that we might die to sin and live to righteousness; for by His wounds you were healed. For you were continually straying like sheep, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Guardian of your souls."