What the Dickens!

It is Christmas Day and it is the first Christmas since Pat passed away that I was not sad when I woke up. When my eyes opened this morning, my heart awoke with gratitude and joy. Home was occupied by just me, my two dogs, and my cat - yet I did not feel lonely at all. My spirit was not weighed down with a melancholy aching for Christmases past. The specters of fear and worry were nowhere in sight. Just a pure joy for the day and the Lord who made it.

The past few weeks have been hectic with this fortnight being particularly exhausting. It would be the first Dec 24th that I had to work. There was very little time between work and church - then I needed to get to the family gathering. The week before it even happened, I was worn out just thinking about it. But then, I watched A Muppet Christmas Carol with my students. I've seen this many, many times. I've seen many versions of A Christmas Carol more times than I could count. Yet once again, even this more playful version spoke to me.

In Dickens' book, Marley’s ghost says to Scrooge ‘’No space of regret can make amends for one life’s opportunity misused.’’ I began to look at working on the 24th as an opportunity. Not only did I get a lot done, but I played cornhole with the kids, enjoyed time with my fellow teachers, and had a great day.

On Sunday, my tearful prayer and the Lord's nudge to change my focus was rewarded with the beauty of His Light. He is the Light of the world - and as Michael Card sang, how can there be in darkness in me if He is that Light? He abides in me and I in Him.  Let that Light shine!  When I taught my yoga class on Monday night, my theme was joy - and indeed, the joy of the Lord is my strength.

I also realized that grief had me dwelling to much in the past on special days. I was burdened by old, beloved traditions that were not, could not be the same. It was like the weight of a heavy stone dragging my heart down.  But in a Christmas Carol, Scrooge learns and says, “I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all Three shall strive within me.’’ The past is only part of the equation of my life; it is to be looked at and learned from. It is not a place to wallow.

When I awoke this morning, it wasn't about me waking up alone; it wasn't about emptiness or the bustle of preparations... it was about the Good News. Jesus Christ came that we might have life and have it more abundantly!  John 1:4, "In Him was life, and that Light was the life of men." --And that waking up alone nonsense, I never felt less alone. Thus, I moved on through a day of laughter and love.  Merry Christmas - regarding the born-again Scrooge - “And it was always said of him, that he knew how to keep Christmas well, if any man alive possessed the knowledge. May that be truly said of us, and all of us!’’