I needed the heavy
Conversations
Twisting, writhing
Painful truths
I was participating in a quest
For making sense
Yet I found that …
Some things are senseless
Sometimes a puzzle is
Missing pieces and so
One simply must throw
It away
My warmth and patience
Once met hurt and indifference
Kindly, and the missing cooled
The heat of anger
“Why did you?”
Sent me outward
For understanding
That never came
I’m not sure when or how or why but
One day the question changed
And so did my direction
I’m okay with finding
My own answers
Wrestling with
What access to me
Is worth
On this new journey I found
Freedom, without residual bitterness
Soft heart, careful life
Centered, safe - the hurt is gone
No repair needed
A door that remains shut
Because I closed it
And threw the key out
Along with that puzzle
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